How to Hide Your Porn from Your Wife

How to Hide Porn From Your Wife
We probably get at least one unsubscribe request per week from someone saying they have to cancel because their wife/girlfriend found out about their account. This is a totally avoidable situation if you’re careful. Read on for some tips for beginners as well as a few advanced techniques for those with savvier spouses.



Step one: Browser Settings
The easiest (and perhaps most suspicious) ways to ensure that your significant other doesn’t know what sites you’ve been visiting is to get into the habit of clearing your browser histories. This includes:

  • Browsing
  • Download
  • Saved form/search
  • Cache
  • Authenticated sessions

The next thing to do is to disable password saving by your browser. It stores a list of your passwords and what sites they’re for.

Step Two: File Management
Most of our members download .wmvs to their harddrives. For those with extra-snoopy partners, a good option may be simply to stream your movies using the Flash player. If that doesn’t work for you, you have a couple of options.

Effort Level: Low
If you don’t want to go through the pain of hiding and renaming files, there are several commercial products on the market that claim to do all of this for you. Some even take care of your browser history as well. The only program that I can confidently endorse because I’ve used it is Heatseek. It’s a browser that keeps all of your history, files and passwords contained in it and can be closed quickly by pressing a single key. It also allows you to choose the program name and icon associated with it (mine’s called Knitting Pro).

Edit: After several members suggested Truecrypt, I gave it a try. It seems like a really solid program, not only for hiding porn, but keeping important documents safe as well.

Effort Level: Medium
The easiest way to hide files is to put them in a folder and hide it. (Duh) But where should you hide your files and how? My advice: the Windows directory. Most people have no reason to ever look in that folder and tend not to understand what’s in there if they do.

  • Start by opening My Computer
  • Click on the C: drive
  • Open the Windows (or WINNT or whatever it is in Vista) folder
  • Create a new folder (try to name it something cryptic like “temp_asc” that no one would bother opening even if they did find it)

For an added layer of protection, you may opt to make the folder a hidden folder by doing the following:

  • Select your new folder and right-click
  • Choose “Properties”
  • Check the box next to “Hide”

Remember – you will not have access to this folder unless you make hidden files visible each time the Windows folder is opened.

Effort Level: High
If you require another level of camouflage, start by following the instructions above. The next step is to start altering the file names to make them innocuous-looking and unable to be opened with a media player (temporarily).

  • Change the file extension (.wmv) of your files to .temp when they aren’t in use. Don’t associate .temp with Winamp or Media Player. When you want to watch your movies, you simply change the file extension back to .wmv
  • Remove words from filenames that might searched for like “fuck” or “tits” or even “teen”

You can also throw your partner off the trail by turning off the operating system history viewable in the Start menu under “Most Recent Documents” or “My Recent Documents”. To disable this option:

  • From the Start menu select “Control Panel”
  • Choose “Taskbar and Start Menu”
  • Select the “Start Menu” tab and choose “Customize”
  • Click on the “Advanced” tab and uncheck the box that says, “List My Most Recently Opened Documents” or equivalent.

Step Three: Concealing Billing
Sometimes discovery of a VideoBox account is due to a spouse noticing our charge on a credit card statement. There are a couple ways to avoid this.

  • If you have a private bank account, you may be better off using the online check option when signing up for service.
  • If you have to use a credit card, hide/shred the bill and come up with a cover story before it gets brought up (“It’s my subscription to Sport Fishing online.”)

I hope that helps. Please feel free to share your personal strategies in the comments. And remember – if all else fails, deny deny deny.

Next week: Hiding Porn on your Mac.

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32 Responses to “How to Hide Your Porn from Your Wife”

  1. RJ Says:

    This is kind of funny. I didn’t realize this was such a huge issue?

    Anyhow, there’s another great free and secure solution.

    I am not going to put a howto, but check out http://www.truecrypt.org. This basically lets you make a container file, in which, it’s contents are encrypted and can only be opened with the correct password. Once opened this is mounted as virtual hard drive. So in essence, make it as big as you’d like. Mount it when you are at the computer, download and move things to it that you want, unmount it when you are not there, and nobody knows. :)

    Also if you use firefox browser, if you want to check out the extension named Stealther (Can find this at http://addons.mozilla.org ) it can be quite a help in preventing anything being stored with your surfing.

    Lastly there’s a great free utility to clean up all the crap on your computer, including all the tracks left by your browser, and it’s named, CrapCleaner and it’s actually quite good despite the name. http://www.ccleaner.com

    Hope this helps some of you.

    As you can tell I do the computer stuff for a living so I have an ungodly ammt of “real life” useless info ;)

  2. B. Anderson Says:

    I suggest that you copy the files to the hard drive and then put them on a dvd. Then delete them. Be sure you are sending to a place you can find them, like my documents. When you delete, best to go to the control panel and go to free up disk space and delete the files there as well as deleting from the documents file. Also remember to empty the recycle bin. Or send them to a memory card direct. Saves room on the hard drive and you’ll avoid prying eyes

  3. Todd Says:

    I have been happily downloading porn for years, and in fact the girlfriend enjoys some of it from time to time, as well! Heck, we even make our own!

    I have some additional suggestions to consider:

    1) buy an external storage device. Right now, I’ve seen 1TB (that’s Terabytes, as in 1000 Gigabytes) on sale at Costco for as little as $300. 500GB can be under $100 elsewhere. Whatever the price or solution, an external hard drive can be portable and hidden when not in use.

    2) Burn to DVD – the post above by B. Anderson is a good one – especially if you have a DVD player that can play WMV files. If not, I know, for example, you can get one that plays WMV and DIVX files at Best Buy for under $80. Honestly, if I had to choose between watching porn on my computer at my desk in an office chair, or watching porn in my living room on my comfy couch on a big screen TV, I’d go for the latter. DVDs are very small and much easier to hide, and leave no residual files where she can find them… unless you forget to eject the disc from the DVD player!

    3) Offer to have her watch some with you! You may think she wouldn’t be into it… but perhaps she might? Test the waters, and don’t expose your whole collection to her. Start small, maybe work it into your own sex lives. Besides, there’s plenty on VideoBox she may enjoy that you don’t!

    4) SURF ON A MAC. I’m on a Mac right now, and I use two browsers for my web sufring – Firefox for day-to-day stuff, and Safari (Apple’s native browser) for porn. The makers of Safari were kind enough to put a “Private Browsing” menu option into their browser – this means all downloads, site histories, URLs, field-fills, etc are NOT tracked or remembered by the computer. No need to wipe your computer after, because it’s already been done by the browser! Note: Mac’s don’t play WMV files natively – you’ll need to install either Windows Media Player for Mac from Microsoft (which is pretty clumsy) or a piece of software called Flip4Mac which plays WMV files in a Quicktime window (a native video player for the Mac). Both are free unless you plan to use them professionally.

    Hope this helps!

    -Todd

  4. Strangepork Says:

    I save my stuff to an external USB hard drive. When its not connected, there’s no porn stored on my computer. If you are more advanced, you might look at an encryption program like Truecrypt. It’s free and open-source: http://www.truecrypt.org/ – It will allow you to encrypt your porn so that nobody can get to it but you. You can even make a hidden encrypted volume inside of an encrypted volume for plausible deniability. (That way, you can put your tax documents, or whatever, in the first level and tell your wife how to get to it. Then, she won’t question why you have encryption software, and it’ll build trust since you showed her how to use it. She doesn’t have to know [and has no way of finding out] that you have another hidden volume with all of your porn in it.)

  5. alison Says:

    RJ, B. Anderson, Todd, Strangepork – Those are all excellent ideas as well. Thanks for sharing them. I’m sure they’ll come in handy for someone!
    - Alison

  6. Jondavisx Says:

    Try CCleaner its free and cleans everything. Also try using say firefox web browser for all your porn stuff. and IE for everything else. Always use external usb harddrives and in the tools folder option select do not show hidden files hide.

  7. MasonSquelch Says:

    I’d second all these hints and would additionally suggest:
    - If you’re browsing with Firefox use different profiles and save yours on an encrypted or external drive. You might put your browser there as well. Some instructions.
    - If your machine is strong enough set up a virtual machine with VMWare (or a similar machine). Make this one your ‘porn’ PC with a different account nobody but you knows.
    - Reserve some disk space on your HD for another operating system and boot this for your private sessions.
    - On a Mac you might activate FileVault for your account and save all data in your home directory.
    - Don’t store passwords for porn sites in your browser (not even for convenience) if you’re not the only one using that browser.

    But if a bunch of porn flicks unsettles your relationship there’s something wrong with it.

  8. videomex Says:

    Don’t hide it, share it with her and enjoy a lot of funny hours together.

  9. RJ Says:

    Just to note, all but my ccleaner solution, also works on a mac, stealther + firefox, and truecrypt as well. easy easy.

    and to the guys suggesting using IE for anything.. poor you.. ;)

    You could always go as far as running 2 diff firefox profiles, and leave 1 simply for adult surfing, but how dare you suggest using IE! ;) LOL.

    If you want to go extreme. Run Linux, and confuse the hell out of your wife/gf, and just leave it out of a GUI when you’re not at it, she’ll have fun typing commands into the bash shell ;) haha

  10. MasonSquelch Says:

    Slightly OT, but here’s a useful synopsis of software that fits on a USB stick. (German site but you should get along with this.)

  11. alison Says:

    Since several of you suggested Truecrypt, I downloaded it and tried it out. It seems like a great program and it will definitely do the job.
    - Alison

  12. walter Says:

    how do i post for a comment on favourite clips and special
    requests fo clips tips /

  13. Gusbin Says:

    I guess one of the best ways to hide your porn is to buy a Portable External Hard Drive. it is small and easy to keep wherever you want. so small you can fit it in your pocket and it will save more than what you PC can save.

    http://www.notebookreview.com/assets/11432.jpg

  14. Gurkin Says:

    Just a thought, is it possiable to have ipod format available for download ?

  15. Todd Says:

    Gurkin – now that’s a GREAT idea! iPod file formats would be pretty darn simple to make – most DVD-ripping software can create iPod formats now…

  16. Gaucho191 Says:

    These are good solutions, but the clean – up stuff can look suspicious – a blank history just looks guilty to me – a good option is MojoPac – basically runs a second instance of Windows XP from an external drive (or flash card/USB key) – so all the cookies, history, registry, junk end up on the mojo drive, and your normal surfing etc stays on the main – you just plug in and switch back and forth as needed – then encrypt and lock up external drive – also handy for running games, other programs without installing – I’ve only played with it a bit, but I’ve liked it so far.

  17. Seth Says:

    Heatseek is a software application designed to make it really easy to keep all your porn browsing and downloading totally private and secure. It’s completely free and has no spyware or viruses. I’ve been using it happily for over a year. You can download it for free at http://www.heatseek.com

  18. jerry Says:

    I recommend that if you are married to someone who has a major problem with you watching porn, that you address the real issue: your wife’s insecurity. From personal experience, life is so much better after the root issues are corrected. And what an awesome love making session we now enjoy watching videos we download on VideoBox.com. Not to mention, they are really educational and can spice up your love life.

  19. Bubbles Says:

    If your hiding porn from your wife what is she hiding from you. Get to know the girl first then marry her, retards

  20. Dapadon Says:

    Another solution to Step 1 is to use and hide another browser. My family only knows about IE and I use a different browser that they don’t know about. I still set my browser to delete everything when I close (JUST IN CASE)

  21. CT Says:

    Try talking to your wife about her fantasy and then finding in the videos and say you downloaded something for her and get her into it. explain you had to join to get the video for her. you just wanted to spice things up for her. But be careful, you just may create a monster, either an angry one if she is not open minded, or a porn loving one if she is open. so be prepared either way.

  22. Mac Man Says:

    Todd, you clearly know what you are talking about!! I second all of your suggestions –
    1. private browsing in Safari is the cleanest way to browse around without a messy trail on your laptop for those occasions when it must be clean – work computer, kids use it, whatever…
    2. external HD is the best storage method. Your entire collection can be streamed wirelessly as well, if you use apple TV. I haven’t bought one yet (waiting for improved models) but I tried a friend’s and they are pretty solid.
    3. Incase the first two thoughts didn’t make this clear – Mac is best for porno viewing – and for that matter, absolutely everything else as well. And you can run windows on your mac as needed.
    4. Why not just watch it with your girlfried or wife?!?!?! Todd, thank you for saying it! If you introduce it slowly and don’t overwhelm… watch how fast she gets into it! And if not, maybe you need a kinkier girlfriend? Just a thought. My girlfriend shocked even me with mow much she enjoyed it. And it really spiced up the sex life – ie, making our own porn… have since had a couple of 3-some, 4-some sessions…. etc. So glad I shared with her!!

  23. Creedence Says:

    What about security over a wireless network? If I’m using the household internet connection wirelessly, is there any way my snoopy brother can read the log files and see what sites are being visited? Any way to secure this?

    Thanks…

  24. morgan Says:

    Get a new girlfriend.

  25. Jen Says:

    Hey, what about hiding internet porn from your husband! I have a very prude man which doesn’t work out well for me b/c I am quite kinky!

  26. Jason Says:

    It seems that few people have mentioned differing browsers and their privacy settings… Example: Mozilla and Firefox… no matter how you adjust the cache, cookies or, history.. many of the files remain on your hard drive anyways. A simple fix to this with nearly all browsers is to: 1st, change the cache and cookie folders to go to your default I.E. matching folders. (Mozilla cache to documents and settings/”your logon name”/local settings/temporary internet files)
    2nd, take two steps. Create a folder on your desktop called Caches.. Then, open Windows Explorer and browse to your Docs and settings folder. Find these folders and drag them over to your new “Caches” folder.. Cookies, Temporary Internet Files, History and, Temp or Temp Files.. Now you have shortcuts to the primary browsing history folders windows uses, not all.. just the primary ones. Every time you close your browser for the day, open these folders and delete everything in them by clicking one file and pressing “CTL + A ” on your keyboard then pressing “delete” on the keyboard. The only files you cannot delete this way are the “.dat” files as they are “registered” files in use by windows.
    Another good add-on to help complete the cleanup is to download Webroot’s “Window Washer” run this after your manual cleanup, it detects and cleans many minor folders most users never even think of such as your Shockwave Flash caches, your Java caches, System history folders, and many of the “.Log” or “.MRU” lists. Most of my Friends and Customers say their partner found their MRU files and caught them from that one file.. MRU= Most recent use, it is a log file for windows error reporting.
    As a power user and programmer with +20 years experience, I could babble on forever. Instead I’ll just suggest two ideas, serious ones not intended to enamour or berate anybody: ONE= Read the windows help and support information about privacy and personal security, there’s a ton of good info there. You can learn about a lot of “faults” in the windows family of OSs and how to use them to YOUR advantage. TWO= Either don’t go there or tell your partner… I showed “VideoBox” to my wife and created a monster. She loves the site. We get many “ideas” from the videos we watch together. After all, if you don’t believe in your partner or your faith in them, why would you want to be with them?

  27. Brain Says:

    You can also burn them to cd’s and hide them in your old music cd’s. Use stuff like Dokken, Anthrax, Ratt, whatever you have that chicks don’t like and you have outlived.

  28. h2ok Says:

    Just installed TrueCrypt… What an awesome product and something I’ve been looking for. Excellent. This site is not just for porn. LOL :-)

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  30. enigmamonkey Says:

    This was great! I didn’t really gain much from this post, since I’m pretty computer savvy (professional programmer), but I found it quite hilarious and very informative. The more you know!

  31. Starship Mechanic Says:

    I’m with the guys saying that you should deal with the root problem of your wife’s hangups about porn. Even if you can successfully hide your porn, it’s just plain bad karma to be constantly hiding things from your wife. The deception is going to eat away at you, the stress of worrying about getting caught … it’s not worth it. Introduce her to porn. Start her with the plot-driven crap, move to gentler gonzo porn, and pretty soon the two of you will be having sex with gangbang videos on the TV.

  32. beta_galactose Says:

    why bother encrypting. On a mac you can easily hide files by using the terminal to create a hidden file

    just cd to the directory that contains your porn folder

    cd /Desktop/stuff/porn

    and type

    mv my_porn .my_porn

    this will hide the folder. when you want to see it again just type

    mv .my_porn my_porn

    saves all the trouble of having to encrypt files, or burn dvds. This also hides the files from being found in a search by spotlight.

    Of course you can just get your wife to watch with you, but a lot of people don’t want some random person besides their wife to find their porn stash when using their computer.