The Best of the Best Awful Porn Titles

Whenever a porn star is mentioned in the news (cough, Tiger Woods, cough), a few of the titles she’s appeared in are usually named to…I don’t know, make people laugh at her? They’re usually pretty run of the mill (Hot Secretaries Who Do Anal #72), but there are some truly awful/hilarious porn movies out there that CNN has never had the reason/balls to mention. Here are some of my favorites:

Best Pun: Cummy Bears


Runners up: Furgeddabou Tits, Hello Titty, Orifice Politics, MILF & Cookies



Best BBW Title: Fuck My Gut Butt


Runners up: Chunky on the 4th of July, Fat & Ugly, Fat Sex In The City, The Chunky Whisperer

Best Parody Title: Throbin Hood Prince of Beaves


Runners up: Shitty Shitty Bang Bang, TrannyFormers, Jackin’ The Beanstalk

Best Rhyming Title: Sluts With Nuts


Runners up: A Little Cumster in the Dumpster, 1 Whore + 1 More = 2 Chicks on 1 Dick #1, Drink From The Stink, Dirty Knees Behind The Trees

Most Upsetting Anal Title: Dirt Pipe Milkshakes


Runners up: Cum Fart Cocktails, Wreck My Rusty Sheriffs Badge, Stink Fillers #1, Get Your Shit Off My Black Dick, Bong Water Butt Babes

Most Nonsensical/Bizarre/Terrible Title: Where the Girls Sweat … A Lot!

Runners up: Topless Brain Surgeons, Toilet Bowl Bitches, Salad Eating Sluts, Interracial Tag Team Ballerina #2, High Graduate Porn, Dominatrix Chess Gambit

Share and Enjoy: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages.
  • Facebook
  • Google
  • bodytext
  • Reddit
  • del.icio.us
  • StumbleUpon
  • TwitThis

Tags:


10 Responses to “The Best of the Best Awful Porn Titles”

  1. the content dude Says:

    Excellent list. My recent fav is ‘Irritable Bowel Syndrome’

  2. ropeadope Says:

    ROTFLMAO! Awesome post, Alison. I think I just woke up all my neighbors (if not the entire neighborhood). It’s 6 AM here. As soon as I scrolled down the page, the cover of Fuck My Gut Butt hit my eyes. I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. The link you provided last week to the 2010 AVN nominees yielded a few interesting titles. Such as (the categories are mine):

    Most Disturbing Title: It’s OK! She’s My Step Daughter

    Most Outdated Worded Title: Oh No! There’s a Negro in My Daughter!

    Best Social Networking Title: Twitter My Shitter

    Best Tranny Title: My Girlfriend’s Cock

  3. davros Says:

    I have to tell ya, when I logged in one day and saw that title that was being offered at that point in time was Fuck my Gut Butt, I wondered what kind of drugs they were smoking when they came up with the name of their BBW title. I also wondered if they ever told the talent what the title of the film they were starring in was.

  4. Mihx Says:

    Some of those anal movie titles are truly nauseating.
    What the hell goes through the heads of the people coming up with those titles? Are they actively trying to minimize sales for obscure financial reasons, or are there actually people out there who might get turned on by a title like “Bong Water Butt Babes”?
    I guess the scary thing is that there probably are :) .

  5. HotScooter2 Says:

    Alison:

    sorry you gotta cough at the mention Of Tiger’s name.But didn’t your mama tell you to cover your mouth lol.

    But you know tiger is just following a golf tradition,of having beautiful women kiss his balls before a tournament.And of course i mean his golf balls lol. sorry this is an old golfing joke and i did not make this one up thank god. but i did think it was appropo. and i am probably not telling it right either. oh yea the golfer is supposed to tell the girl to kiss his balls for good luck

  6. Papayaman1 Says:

    If you are a Brit Chew on my Spew has got to be the most awful title. And the kicker is that its a series!

  7. Derp33 Says:

    Not on this site, but the best/most hilarious title I’ve ever seen is a tie between: “slurpee sluts suck deez nuts” and “yo quiero taco smell”

    The second one is particularly disturbing…

  8. housedj69 Says:

    My favorite is “I Was Tight Yesterday”.

  9. yojimbo Says:

    Chew On My Spew was a pretty bad one recently. The worst by far how ever is Irritable Bowel Syndrome #4.

  10. Buy Bongs Says:

    Fuck My Butt Gut, hahahahaha